lyra's lament

'she's gone... i'll never see my precious bon bon again...'

it had been just over a week since lyra and bon bon first woke up in the wasteland. lyra and bon bon had been wondering where, and why, so many ponies had been disappearing from all over equestria for over a month. then one night, their question got "answered" when they suddenly passed out in the park, and woke up in, what can only be described as, a warzone.


lyra's mind kept replaying the images in her head over and over again:
she tried her best to get her and bon bon away from a battle between a group of humans and a bunch of terrifying green monsters. they ran as fast as they could, bullets and explosions just barely missing them. they were almost out of there, all that stood between them and (what they were hoping to be) safety was a thick pile of debris. they climbed as fast as their hooves could go. they were almost over the pile of debris, when bon bon got shot in one of her legs. lyra tried to help bon bon up. there was blood, bon bon's blood, everywhere.
"almost there, just a little more! we're gonna make it bon bon, i promise!" lyra's voice could barely be heard over the sounds of the ongoing fight. just a few more inches, and they would be over the debris.

one of the green monsters saw what they were doing. it was really pissed at them for trying to run away. it aimed a rocket launcher right at the two ponies.
"DIE PONIES, YOU GO BOOM NOW!"

lyra and bon bon heard it. they turned their heads towards the monster, and saw a missile flying right towards them, right towards bon bon. lyra pulled bon bon with all her strength, but she wouldn't move. bon bon locked eyes with lyra, tears quickly forming in her eyes. she smiled at the love of her life for the final time, and pushed lyra away from her as hard as she could.
"i love you lyra"-


-lyra snapped back to reality. she couldn't handle seeing that last part again. sometime after the missile hit, a group of humans, probably the ones from the fight (guess they won...), found lyra unconscious and severely wounded, but alive. they brought her to megaton, where the ass-of-a-doctor "nursed" her (as in injecting her with a few stimpacks then telling her to get the hell out of his clinic, as soon as she woke up after a couple days...) back to health.

lyra had been crying nonstop over bon bon's death for days. the other residents in megaton tried to comfort her, but without any success. the mercenaries that were currently in town just told her to just accept what happened and move on, that people and ponies die everyday. lyra just couldn't understand humans, and why they just don't care if someone they know dies.

lyra looked around the pub she was in, Moriarty's Saloon. it was a... well-constructed piece of scrap metal and junk, to say the least. compared to this place, even the sleazyest of pubs of downtown manehattan looked gorgeous. lyra was about to leave, when she noticed another pony, a pegasus, on the bar-stool next to her. she was grey, with a yellow, messy mane and tail. she was covered head to hoof in dirt. lyra couldn't even see the pegasai's cutie mark through the dirt. she looked so familiar... could it be-

the grey pony turned towards Lyra, her yellow-amber eyes pointing in opposite directions.
"hey *hic* lyra..."

-Derpy Hooves... and she sounded drunk, or close to it at least...

"...heard about you and *hic* bon bon's little adven-*hic*-ture in the DC ruins."

lyra wanted to kick Derpy right in the jaw.
'LITTLE ADVENTURE?!?!? what the hell is wrong with her?!?' lyra stared right at derpy hooves, her pupils the size of a grain of sand.

derpy knew lyra enough to know that face (or more specifically, eyes) meant she was really pissed off, and did one of her classic "oopsies" faces (complete with adorable and innocent smile).
"hehe ummmm *hic* sorry..."

it took a few seconds for lyra to calm down completely.
'she's just drunk and stupid. she didn't mean to piss me off, she's just a friggin DERP!' lyra replayed that thought until she calmed down.
"why are you here, Derpy? i mean, in megaton."

Derpy looked down, her ears folded down. lyra could have sworn she saw tears start to form in derpy's eyes.
"i *hic* abandoned doc..."

it took a second for lyra to remember that derpy always called Doctor Whooves "doc". for as long as lyra knew the two of them, derpy had the BIGGEST crush on doctor whooves. of course, the Doctor was completely oblivious to derpy's constant state of going all gaga over him. lyra had to admit, it was always kinda cute to see derpy trying her best to flirt with the Doctor, who was completely oblivious to it.

"you... abandoned him? but you're his assistant! why did you do that? besides, i thought you always wanted to be with him 24/7!" lyra was genuinely worried about derpy. why would she abandon him, out there in the wasteland, of all places?

"it's his other *hic* assistant, Colgate... i... i don't really wanna *hic* talk about it... not right now..."

derpy hooves and Colgate always competed over the Doctor, who of course was oblivious to BOTH of them... lyra could only assume that colgate went so far as to upset derpy enough that she ran away, the poor thing. lyra never did like colgate much, considering how mean Colgate could get to those she didn't like, such as Derpy Hooves.

lyra pulled the drunken depressed pegasai into an embrace and hugged her.
"awww derpy, im so-"

derpy pushed away from lyra immediately.
"OOOOOO OOO OOO *hic* DERPY REMEMBERS OTHER REASON WHY SHE *hic* HERE!!"

"what? what other reason?" lyra replied.

Derpy cleared her throat, then spoke.
"bon bon wants you to know that she's okay, and that she misses you lots. OH, and she loves you." derpy put on a smile of satisfaction, only to get ferociously tackled by an enraged lyra.

"YOU STUPID MULE! BON BON'S DEAD, I SAW HER DIE!!! DON'T BUCK WITH ME, YOU RETARDED, WALLEYED DRUNKARD!!!!!"

Derpy was absolutely devastated from lyra's attack on her. her entire body was uncontrollably shaking from the fear of quite possibly getting mauled by lyra.
"b-b-b-b-b-b-b-but *hic* i-i-i-i'm *hic" s-serious *hic hic hic*! let me explain *hic*!"

lyra stared into derpy's soul, or so derpy felt like she was.
"you got 10 SECONDS!"

derpy took in a deep breath then spat out her explanation as quick as she could.
"bon bon never died she was found by some *hic* humans who took her to Rivet City and made her *hic* better i mean yeah she looked like someone took a *hic*cheese grater to her body but they're fixing that so now she *hic* looks all pretty for you and she really does miss you and *hic* love you and want you to come see her and PLEASE DON'T KILL MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE *hic hic hic hic*!!!!"

lyra immediately got off derpy and started jumping around the saloon not unlike pinkie pie.
"OMIGOSH SHE'S ALIVE SHE'S ALIVE SHE'S ALIVE!!!! oh GOSH, DERPY! are you okay, im so sorry for saying all those things to you, i didn't mean it!!!!!!!"

derpy stood up and shook her head a bit and smiled at lyra.
"yeah i'm *hic* fine."

lyra hugged Derpy as tight as she could.
"thank you thank you thank you so much derpy! can you take me to rivet city pleaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaase?????"

"sure, i'll *hic* guide you there. but could you *hic* ummmm *hic* help me deal with *hic* Colgate? PLEAAAASE I REALLY MISS DOC I SHOULD BE WITH HIM, NOT COLGATE!!!!" derpy started to cry right then and there.

lyra was about to cry as well, for derpy, but held it in and hugged derpy.
"i'm sorry derpy, but we don't know where she and the Doctor are. they could be anywhere by now! im sorry."

derpy gave lyra a blank stare
"she calls bon bon a dirty, ugly slut"

lyra let go of derpy and threw her hooves up in the air.
"alright, as soon as i get reunited with my precious and BEAUTIFUL bon bon, all of us will find Colgate and KICK THE BITCH'S ASS!!!!!!!!!!!"


---to be continued---

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<<<PART 2>>> -->
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<<part 1.5 its a joke one lol. not cannon to this story)>> --->
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**UPDATE** i finally figured out how to use the clone stamp ^^ removed the guy behind Derpy


well, this has got to be the LONGEST short story i have ever written in my life lol XD hope you all enjoyed it, if you even read it all lol XD


derpy hooves vector :thumb258969731: by
lyra vector by
fallout 3 belongs to bethesda ^^